Well shiver me timbers, hoist the mainbrace and other nautical terms I'm supposed to be knowing, but really cant be bothered with, It appears ive got some competition out there.

He goes by the name of Dread Pirate David, and is apparently the scourge of many a lake, several rivers, the occasional stream and countless puddles, rumour has it he doesnt like the sea too much after being sexually assaulted by a dolphin, but if you will swim naked with your backside above the waves pretending its a blowhole what do you expect?

 

Right now me hearties, be on the lookout for this imposter, as he doesnt follow the code, I know I know theyre only guidlines anyway, but this guy has a hippo fetish thats too much even for a man of the world like me, just look at this mugshot http://jack-sparrow.zoints.com/album/?imgid=9650

 

thats all for now

Well that was a close shave, I thought Norrington was going to hang me for sure this time, who knew old Bootstraps boy would spring me in the nick of time. I always did like that lad....... shame about his taste in hats though......

Now that Elizabeth is a different story entirely, why I'd like to get her in my cabin for a bit of ..... well you know what I mean (Hic). Lovely lass, got the hots for me I reckon, cant show it though mores the pity.

 

Anyone seen my rum?

 

Now... bring me that horizon......... Oh and some more Rum (Burp)